back One of the 45 stories

After going for drinks after work (in the hospitality industry), I was bit more drunk than I normally am. I was supposed to bike 20 minutes on my own to get back home, but my colleagues thought it would be wiser if someone would bike with me. So a colleague went with me, but I had to pee badly, so he suggested we go to his house so I could go pee. I agreed, thinking he just wanted to be friendly. He lived in the neighborhood, after all.

Once at his place, I sat on his couch for a bit. It was pretty late and I fell asleep on his couch by accident. A few hours after, I woke up and felt my vagina hurting and I was lying on a bed without clothes on.                                                                                                                            Not knowing what had happened, I quickly put my clothes back on and went home. I spend hours in the shower, because I felt so dirty.

A few months later, I got a boyfriend and he worked at the same company. There was a rule among the men that if someone had sex with a girl before another they would get 5 euros. I didn’t say anything to my boyfriend.

One night, the colleague who raped me told my boyfriend he wanted 5 euros. My, now ex, boyfriend completely lost it, because I hadn’t told him. He didn’t know I couldn’t remember anything from that night and that it was basically rape.

To date, no one knows about this. I still feel so much shame about what happened.